Family heirloom

Growing up,

you’d stare at a family photo

on your grandparents’ wall

The one of your grandfather,

his older siblings and parents

dressed in somber suits and dresses,

stiff, unsmiling

Adult brothers arrayed in the back,

three sisters bracket seated parents,

a little boy on mother’s lap

trying to sit still

The little boy was old

when you came along,

called him grandpa,

and followed him to the shed

for a bucket of coal on chilly evenings

As you grew older,

you learned good families kept secrets,

created an altered reality

for family, friends, neighbors

and siblings too young to know the truth

You wondered about the little boy

squirming on his mother’s lap,

her white hair, wrinkled face,

weathered age-spotted hands

You imagine her cropped from the picture

and think she looks like a grandmother

trying to control her grandson

You flit your gaze back and forth

from sister to sister,

examine faces and body language

trying to discern which one

may be holding back an urge

to console her child

Hoping she will betray

a family narrative and secrets

her family is desperate to keep

And you think

what became of love denied

6-17-21